Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Putting on the gloves.

Ok, we're going to be a bit philosophical this morning (at least until the big honking pill that my pdoc told me to take this morning kicks in.  That's the sleepy pill, so I may drop as I write this.)

Anyway . . .

Have you ever leaned back from your life and wondered what's worth fighting for?  Is it a relationship?  Your children?  Your dogs?(ok Mom, had to throw that one in)  Your job?  Your possessions?  Your house?  Your sanity?  Your faith?  Yourself?  Have you ever wondered what you would stick it out to the bitter end for.  What you would risk your sanity for?

As the commercial says, what would you put on your pedestal?

Depression, or really I think any serious illness, makes you ask this question on a daily basis. Because you are fighting.  Fighting to get well, certainly.  But fighting for other things as well. Fighting to have a certain kind of life.  Fighting to fend off the darkness.  Fighting to figure out what the hell is going on and what it is you are supposed to be doing in your life.  Hard, if not down right impossible, to do when your tank is on empty.  But important.  The books do get one thing right - they talk about discovering what you live for, as a way to hold off the seduction of suicide.

But I think it's a good question for everyone now and again.  What would you fight for today?

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